ABCing Widgets

   Most people see their behavior as a direct response to something that has happened.

  Examples:

   - Someone cuts me off on the road, that angers me.

   - Something goes wrong, that frustrates me.

  To put this in smokers terms:

   - I just got out of bed and can barely open my eyes. I need a cigarette.

   - I'm so angry I could bite through steel!!! I really need a cigarette.

   The 2 step 'event-response' sequence is incomplete in that there is a third step between the event and our response where we make one or several statements to ourselves about the event. In the 3 step scenario, all behavior can be organized within a sequence that begins with an event, moves to beliefs about the event, and concludes with a response that is based entirely on the beliefs.

    The ABC cognitive exercise, as developed by Albert Ellis in his Rational Emotive Therapy, is a graphic representation of behavior involving:

  A - one activating event.

  B - one or several beliefs/self talk statements.

  C - one consequent response which is solely determined by the statements in B.

   This exercise is used to examine an established behavior pattern and then re-evaluate the associated old beliefs in order to create new responses. To actually write out an ABC diagram, on a piece of paper, draw 3 boxes side by side and large enough to write a couple of sentences in each. Label them left to right A, B, and C.

   By way of example, lets say that an event has happened i.e. I've just gotten out of bed in the morning and I'm groggy. To put this into an ABC template, first I'd determine the event and write, in the A box, "I just woke up. I'm groggy". Then I'd determine what my beliefs are and write those in the B box. Keep in mind that our beliefs and self talk are historically the same each time a particular event or category of events are encountered. BTW, initially this B step is the most difficult to fill in. However, with just a bit of practice, it quickly becomes the easiest. This is because we already know most of our beliefs and self talk statements. We've held those beliefs and repeated those statements with almost every cigarette we lit through all the years we smoked. It's just that it all became so automatic so very long ago that we simply no longer hear what we tell ourselves. If you're wondering how it is that a person can tell themselves something and not be aware of the 'conversation', it's a bit like living next to railroad tracks or near an airport. Eventually, you stop being aware of the constant sounds and notice them only on the occasions when they're particularly loud. It's also in this forgotten and unheard area where concepts like 'nicodemons' and 'cigarettes as our best friend/lover/etc' have their roots. To get back to the exercise, examples of Bs might be "A cigarette has always helped to wake me up. If I smoke one now I'll feel better …. at least feel more awake. It's been 7 or 8 hours since my last cigarette, I need a nicotine fix NOW!"

   Take another look at these sample statements.........

  1- "A cigarette has always helped to wake me up."

  2- "If I smoke one now I'll feel better …. at least I'll feel more awake."

  3- "It's been 7 or 8 hours since my last cigarette, my addicted body needs a nicotine fix NOW!"

   We've just finished telling ourselves that smoking a cigarette would be a tried and proven, effective, and needed response. Is there any reason, given these B statements, why we would even consider any response other than to light up?

   The consequent response, by the very nature and wording of the beliefs in B, will be the experience, to some degree of intensity, of an urge to smoke. Write in the C box "I have an urge to smoke", At this point we've used the ABC template to graphically define how we used to get from the 'wake up' event to the 'morning urge' response.

   To recap:
A (event) - just woke up and I'm groggy
  B (beliefs) - nicotine has always been the fastest way to kick start myself.
  C (consequent response) - a strong urge to light up and be woken up

   Most of us have heard, "If your actions produce the same results time after time, and you want different results, then change your actions." If we accept that saying as fairly self evident, examining our statements in B and re-evaluating those statements in light of a current awareness and our present goals and desires will result in a response that addresses, and is in keeping with, how we want to behave. Very often, old established statements are outdated. They may or may not have been accurate and true at some early point, but have long since become forgotten and unheard. And other statements will still be accurate and true, like the one about a cigarette 'waking' us up. However true it might be, given our current goals, it isn't an appropriate statement on which to base a response.

   To continue to use the ABC model, we'd draw another box under B and label it B1, and one more under C labeled C1. Now we re-evaluate B and write the changes in B1. B1 might become any or all of the following:

  1- "A cigarette has always helped in the past, however, I've chosen to quit and work toward regaining a natural and more healthy way to live which includes getting up in the morning without the use of chemical aids.

  2- "If I smoke one now I'll not feel better, in fact I'll probably feel dizzy, nauseous, and I'll have to deal with a sense of having failed that will make all I've gone through so far pointless. Within moments of lighting up I'll be disappointed with myself. Not a great way to start my day."

  3- (The following would apply if NRT is a quit aid, including nic patches if they're not worn at night) "It's been some hours since my last nic fix and my still addicted body 'needs' it's fix. However, I'm using a nic replacement program that will wean me from nicotine. Yes my body needs it's fix, but it'll receive it in keeping with my program and in the proper dose and delivery system."

  4- "Other ways to come awake could be to take a shower, eat a balanced breakfast that will provide energy for hours instead of the short lived nicotine rush, get a bit of exercise."

   Given these re-evaluated statements, the new C1 will be a rational and cognizant choice. Personally, I'd go with 'eat breakfast' and then 'a shower'. However, I've got to keep in mind that regardless of my choice, I may still feel lousy. From time to time I'm going to experience physical or emotional discomforts. That's part of life. Staying quit and the methods we use aren't about feeling good all the time. That's completely unrealistic. What is important is that as long as we continue to choose to be aware, we will continue to make responsible choices. Our responsible choices result in behavior that will keep us quit.